Thursday, January 31, 2008

Women and Dogs Who Love Too Much: Part 2

I actually think I could teach Dog the word “Sunday” and he would get it. But that doesn’t solve my bigger problem. Dog is obsessively in love with me and no one else will do as long as he thinks he can get me. (Yes, I know, except for maybe Cameron.)

The night before Sunday (described in the previous post) when I was out with the kids, my husband, Jeff, tried to lure Dog up on the couch to snuggle and watch a movie. No dice. Jeff even admitted to placing a piece of cheese on the couch, but Dog could not be distracted from his post at the front door window, waiting and hoping, patiently for my return. Let’s make this clear—Dog was refusing CHEESE to instead hungrily pine away for me in his lonely vigil. That’s got to be a dog’s definition of Loving Too Much.

Which brings us to the philosophical discussion of Love and exactly What Love Is.

People are always talking about how their dogs give them unconditional love. Is that really true? In one sense, Yes, it is.

A dog will love you in spite of (or maybe even because of) all the flaws that would make well-adjusted humans recoil in disgust. Haven’t had a shower in a week? You are even more attractive to Dog! The combo of sweaty armpits and dirty socks is the Chanel Number 5 of a dog’s world. Like to lie around on the couch and eat junk all day? So does Dog! Being fat, lazy, messy—not an issue—maybe even a plus with your dog!

Dog and Me, No Shower, No Makeup, No Problem

But true, unconditional love—not so fast. While Dog genuinely Likes most people and will happily greet them, he reserves his special love for me—the person who feeds, walks, plays and spends time with him.

Who makes a breakfast of microwaved egg yolk and dog food even before she pours her first cup of coffee? Who walks Dog in the rain? Who, if Dog has been left alone for a few hours, walks into the house and throws the squeaky toy even before she takes off her pantyhose?

Me, that’s right. I am the one and only person who puts Dog’s needs above her own pretty much most of the time, which admitting in print, makes me think I am hopelessly weird and unfocused and makes me wonder if I should spend more time jogging or working on my book proposal or organizing my closets.

It’s not an approval or an ego thing. Nobody gives a hoot, or even knows, whether your dog approves of you or not. Instead, it is this undeniable empathy or responsibility or pure goodness or pure guilt or whatever… I believe that the way you treat your dog is a moral compass. Because it’s all about the other being, who can’t complain or gossip about you or withhold sex or money. The dog is just an independent being, a little like Blanche DuBois, dependent on the kindness of strangers.

Back to Obsessive Love--I have the same problem with the rest of my family as I have with Dog. Everybody wants to be with me! If only I could have been so popular in high school! But let’s examine the source of their love…Is it because of my sharp wit and sparkling personality and general fabulosity?

I think not. Most likely, it has more to do with the fact that I Do Absolutely Every Thing For Them from making their sandwiches to calling out words for the Spelling Bee to washing their gym clothes at 9 pm on Sunday night to planning their birthday parties to asking them about their day (and really listening to the answer!)

(And, now that I think of it, if I had been just as self-sacrificing and generous—letting kids copy my homework and engaging more frequently in gratuitous heavy petting, I probably would have been just as popular in high school…)

In essence, I care. I really do. For some weird reason in this very self-obsessed world, in my very own, self-obsessed Universe, I (mostly) care about Dog, my husband, and my kids—more than I care about myself.

Oh, I’ve heard about the oxygen mask analogy and it makes total, rational sense. (Put on your own mask first, then save the others.) But when the plane is going down, it’s going to be your first instinct to put the mask on your kids. You might die in the process, but so be it. The plane is going down—you save your kids first. I would totally do that. It’s not an intellectual decision, but a gut reaction.

Such is the nature of Loving Too Much. Probably not a good thing in general, but it’s what we do and if it’s instinctive and honest and if we go down because of it, so be it. There are worse ways to go.

A Few Words of Wisdom on Love:

"You may only be one person to the world, but you may also be the world to one person (or dog)" - anonymous quote

Monday, January 28, 2008

Women Who Love Too Much (and the Dogs They Love) (and the Dogs Who Love Them)



Remember that book from the 80’s, Women Who Love Too Much? (Subtitled When You Keep Wishing and Hoping He’ll Change.) Back in the day of all those cleverly-titled zillion-copy best-seller, self-help relationship volumes like Smart Women, Foolish Choices and Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. This particular book was all about “women who believe being in love means being in pain.”

I think I might have made fun of that book at one time. But I’m not laughing now.

“Pain” was heavy on my mind this Sunday morning at 6 am when Dog did his best to wake me up from a dead sleep, jumping up on my side of the bed, clawing and whining for my attention. Even though my husband tried to rescue me by offering to take Dog downstairs and let me sleep in, Dog refused to leave my side. Such is the obsessive loyalty of Too Much Love.

Normally Dog and I are up before dawn. We like it that way. We get a little time to sneak in a cup of coffee and a chicken treat and a bit of a snuggling/writing session on the couch before the rest of the family gains consciousness and starts making demands for pancakes and signed permission slips and clean underwear.

But on a normal night before a normal morning, I’m normally soundly snoozing by 10 pm. But the night before Sunday was not normal and I was up past midnight taking the kids to see a friend in a regional production of The Wizard of Oz. Not enough sleep! And it was Sunday!

No matter. As smart as Dog is, I can’t seem to get him to understand the concept of the weekly calendar or a teacher’s workday. (And, to be fair to Dog, the random holidays and week-long Winter/Spring breaks and the big Summer vacations must be very confusing to him--I know they are to me!)

Although Dog's breed has been raised to be purely companion dogs, I truly think that Dog has a bit of a work ethic in him (maybe it's nurture vs. nature working here) and he believes that it is his sole responsibility to make sure that everyone is up and out of the house on time. I think it gives him a sense of purpose, which is probably very important to his self-esteem, and is something that I, as a transplanted native Californian, feel obligated to honor.

So, even though I was able to use my Alpha Dog commands and get Dog to leave me alone for awhile, at 6:45 am, he was absolutely frantic about waking me up. As I stumbled into my slippers, he didn’t follow his normal routine of going downstairs with me. He barged immediately into my daughter’s room—intent on waking her up for school, which is his normal task--Monday through Friday.

“Dog, It’s Sunday!” I reprimanded in a whisper so as not to wake my sleeping daughter. Dog rolled over on his back in the "surrender" position.

“Damn Dog,” I muttered to myself as I picked him up and carried him down the steps and walked into the kitchen to put on the coffee. “Sunday, Sunday! Sunday is a very important concept!” Certainly more important than “Sit” and maybe even more important than “Go Pee-Pee” or “Treat”—at least to me.

To be continued….

Friday, January 25, 2008

Ya Gotta Have Friends, Part 2: My Pack


Last night I got together with my pack—a group of extraordinary moms, friends and writers. We began almost six years ago as virtual strangers. We came together in kind of a happenstance karma: a friend of a friend who knew two of us were aspiring writers and scribbled our names and numbers on an envelope; a failed attempt at forming a Writers’ Group; a chance conversation between new neighbors.

Through the magic of time and the unabashed sharing of dreams, disappointments, successes and troubles, we have grown into the kinds of friends that you might read about in a really good Chick Lit book and know that it had to be totally made-up— just too good to be true.

We call ourselves The Literary Lushes, which is surely a bit of an embellishment (we’re writers, after all!) Introducing my pack, in the order in which they appear:

Amy Moellering—the modern incarnation of the 50’s sitcom moms like Leave It to Beaver and Father Knows Best, with a little I Love Lucy on the side. Amy is now busying herself putting the finishing touches on her wonderful, heartfelt YA novel. Amy also writes a weekly column for the local paper about schools, a subject about which she is quite the expert as she tirelessly volunteers and shuttles around her three very talented, super-active kids.

Keely Parrack—an inspiration to us all—a smart, funny Brit with a laser-beam focus, who can’t be tempted away from her writing schedule for silly pursuits like going for coffee, cleaning the toilets or grocery shopping. Keely just landed a Big-Time New York City agent to represent her YA novel, Fragments. Remember this name, and that you heard it here first.

Cameron Sullivan—what else can I say about Cameron, that I haven’t already said, here. Other than being the Other Woman in Dog’s life, she is contagiously fun and enthusiastic and passionate and one of the most prolific writers I personally know. She has written over 100 humor columns for our local paper and so many feature articles that I don’t even think she bothers to clip them any more. Cameron is now furiously working away on her YA novel.

Grace Navalta—award-winning storyteller, and one of the most generous, kind and joyful people I know. And resilient! No matter what life throws at her, Grace comes roaring back—wiser and wilder than ever. Grace is working on a totally amazing multi-generational tale of her family’s life from the Philippines to the United States.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again—I love my pack.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Ya Gotta Have Friends!


It’s been very rainy in Northern California. Rainy and cold and gloomy, which makes me want to pull up the covers and hide away with a big mug of something warm to drink and a good book and ignore everything on my To-Do list.

But there is one thing on my list that can’t be ignored—walking Dog. I can easily go a day without doing the dishes, or answering the phone or e-mails or even taking a shower, but Dog’s walk is non-negotiable.

Let's make this clear--I am not a routine-type person by nature. But having kids or dogs forces you into this weird mode of self-sacrifice in which you end up kind of vicariously enjoying and even rationalizing boring routines as a fulfilling way to spend your time. I am holding the family together here! And, really, if I didn’t have to walk the dog or make chocolate-chip pancakes for breakfast and pack lunches and check homework and drive kids to school, what would I be dong? Perhaps wasting my time sleeping in, getting pedicures, or writing the Great American Novel. What fun would that be?

So I have gotten Dog into the habit of having a walk every morning at a certain time and he holds me to our unspoken promise of routine.

I would venture to guess that in the last year and a half Dog has been walked almost every single day—the only rare exceptions are days when it pours rain down all day as it did a couple of weeks ago or I am sick in bed and can’t move. Maybe three days out of the last 500. The Dog Whisperer would be proud!

But today, in the brief break in the rain, when it was only drizzling, we went for our walk and Dog refused to go along the routine path. He tugged on the leash and sat down on the path and insisted on going to his doggie-friend, Cody’s house. (This is the Havanese that my husband fell in love with that propelled us to get Dog.) I felt pretty stupid, but we knocked on the door and I meekly said that I thought Dog was wanting to have a playdate…

The dogs have been having a blast.


Running around, chasing each other, playing in a way that they can only do because they GET each other. I can walk or play squeekie-toy with Dog, but as much as I want to relate, I can’t. I’m not a dog.

I have to remember this in my own life. I love my friends. But I sometimes forget when I have so many other demands on my time, that my fabulous, smart, amazing friends are a source of inspiration and energy.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day!

This morning I read on Yahoo News that although everybody knows that Martin Luther King, Jr. made the famous “I have a dream” speech, that’s all that most of us know about this mythological man whose birthday we’re celebrating today. We don’t even know what his dream was.

When I first began writing my book, Let Go, Let Miracles Happen, I didn’t know any more than the average person about MLK. Then, while doing research for the book, I came across a wonderful collection of his sermons—Strength to Love. Wow! In the truest sense of the word, Wow! This is one of the most brilliant, loving, inspired, powerful books I have ever read.

In honor of this day and this great, great man, I offer the following story (that I included in Let Go) that illustrates the power of surrendering our problems, continuing to act on the solution, and letting go of our specific idea of what that solution should be:

When Dr. King was leading the bus boycott in Montgomery, Alabama, they set up a car pool to help people get around. The car pool operated without problem for eleven months, but then, the mayor of Montgomery had had enough. He instructed the city’s leading department to file proceedings making the car pool—or any other mode of transportation in support of the boycott—illegal. A hearing was set to decide the matter.

Dr. King tells how he dreaded telling supporters the news that the car pools would probably be closed down. This meant that they had only two choices: Either they would all have to walk to work, or take the buses again and admit that the boycott had failed.

“When the evening (before the hearing) came,” writes Dr. King, “I mustered sufficient courage to tell them the truth. I tried, however, to conclude on a note of hope. ‘We have moved all of these months,’ I said, ‘in the daring faith that God is with us in our struggle. The many experiences of days gone by have vindicated that faith in a marvelous way. Tonight we must believe that a way will be made out of no way.’”

The next day, the hearing did not go well, and it looked like Dr. King and his supporters would lose, and the carpools would be outlawed. All seemed hopeless. Then, an amazing thing happened. At a brief recess, there was a commotion in the courtroom, and a reporter handed Dr. King the news, “The United States Supreme Court today unanimously ruled bus segregation unconstitutional in Montgomery, Alabama.” Someone shouted from the back of the courtroom, “God Almighty has spoken from Washington!”

It’s a good thing that Dr. King didn’t pray to keep the car pool. God had a much better way of solving his problem!

This story still gives me chills when I read it. May we all celebrate Martin Luther King, Jr. today by living his dream, (as Coretta Scott King writes) “By reaching into and beyond ourselves and tapping the transcendent moral ethic of love.”

Thursday, January 17, 2008

More Dog on Politics

Dog and I were sitting at the dinner table with the kids last night (OK, I was sitting AT the table and Dog was UNDER the table, begging for roast beef scraps) and we decided to have a conversation about something more culturally significant than 3rd grade math test races or middle school friendship dramas.

“Let’s talk about the election!” I said and Dog wagged his tail furiously in agreement (or maybe just his optimistic, “cute-dog” begging strategy…)

“So, children,” I said in my best pseudo-intellectual, self-satisfied, politically-conscious, good-mom voice, “What do you think is the most important quality in selecting a president?”

“Getting the most votes!” said Savannah, my literal-minded, analytical child.

“Yes, of course. That’s obvious,” I responded, thinking to myself that this obvious strategy didn’t work out so well for Gore in 2000.

“Let me phrase it differently. What quality is most important to YOU in a candidate who YOU would vote for?”

“Honesty,” was Savannah’s immediate answer. “And being frank with the voters. But I guess that’s kind of the same thing.” I think Savannah may have perhaps been influenced a teeny, tiny bit by plucking “Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them” by Al Franken off of my bookshelf.

“How about you, Carson?”

“Honesty,” says my second-born who adores and emulates his sister. And then his wise-cracking evil twin added, “And puppy-pink nail polish for the girls!”

“What if Obama wore puppy-pink nail polish?” asked Savannah in her hard-hitting, Mike Wallace-in-training style. “Would you vote for him?”

“Yes!” And then Carson added, “Just kidding!”

But sometimes I wonder if the election might come down to such frivolous issues. I wonder if some candidates might just be desperate enough to don puppy-pink nail polish or some other similarly ridiculous issue position or media ploy in the hopes to gain a few votes that would tip them over the top.

I tried to explain the concept of state primaries and delegates and conventions and the parts that they play in who we, as a country, decide who will run for president.

I was surprised that my children had not learned any of this in their very fine public schools, and then, I was even more surprised that I, the political junkie that I am, could not answer many of the questions about how we nominate presidential candidates, especially when it came to numbers.

Then I did something that is a definite No-No in terms in family dinner etiquette—I brought out my laptop for some dinner-time Googling.

And here, with the requisite disclaimers about the unreliability of info found on the Internet, are some interesting things we learned about how we nominate Democrats and Republicans for president:

• Democrats and Republicans both determine their nominees by who wins the majority of delegates from the various state primaries and caucuses.
• The rough numbers are about 2,000 for the Democrats and about 1,000 for the Republicans.
• About 40% of the Democratic delegates are “super-delegates” who are not bound by voters. These super-delegates include Democratic governors and members of Congress, and former democratic elected officials, like Bill Clinton, Jimmy Carter, and Al Gore. Which essentially means that, for the Democrats, winning the popular vote is important, but, in the case of a fractured party, as may very well be the case this year, the old Boys network is even more important.

This could be the most interesting primary election season in memory. The Republicans are all over the place. They could go into the convention with no real winner. They would have to fight it out at the convention. That would be fun for Dog to watch.

With the Democrats, the question is, who is more of an Old Boy? Hillary Clinton or Barrack Obama?

Unlike me, Dog is a one issue voter. Dog’s vote is with whoever is offering roast beef.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Guest Blogger--Savannah!


“Savannah…will you write a guest blog for me?”

“WHY?”

“You have nothing else to do.”

Hmm. Good point.

My name is Savannah, daughter of dog-writer extraordinaire Kathy (she wouldn’t compliment herself, so I had to do it), and partial owner of the all-important Dalai Dog. I do behind-the scenes work.

For example, I have just succeeded in forcing Dog into a too-tight black shirt emblazoned with the golden, glistening words “Local Celebrity.” (He IS quite pupular.) Check back for the Podcast of this exciting adventure! (As soon as we can figure out how to download videos from the new camera.)

Worn out after a few fruitless minutes at the beginning of the battle, already nursing a bite to the thumb, I protested, “It doesn’t fit him!”

Mom: “That shirt is for MEDIUM-SIZED dogs. Make it fit!” A verbal example of the side of her that you have never seen before, as she is usually mellow and sharp-witted before writing about Sunny in the Dalai Dog Blog. I, meanwhile, am forced to simply comply because I have no other ways of occupying my time tonight. (I really need to get a life.)

Mom has shown you Dog’s opinion on matters such as Halloween, snow, and the presidential election of 2008. What do I, the low-life stagehand and understudy to usual blogger, Kathy, have to say on the subject of the furry, white animal?

For starters, he is persistent. I am, too; this similarity is number one between us. If you put a beef bone in the middle of a table, four feet off the ground, Dog, at approximately ten inches in height, will find a way to get it—whether his methods be pulling the tablecloth away, pushing a chair over to use as a stepladder, or just crying in that annoying, irresistible high-pitched way that he has until you give in and put the treasure on the floor. I suppose that last one could be attributed to a whining toddler or a bratty teenager who will stop at nothing to get what she wants.

I have the same trait, so I prefer to label it DETERMINATION,


which I understand to be a very good thing among students trying to get into Harvard and business people trying to make a lot of money, but not so much among Dogs and pre-teens who may have other goals in mind.

Secondly, Dog is stubborn. (Which can be roughly translated as “persistent,” and I have just written about that, but…it doesn’t count as a blog entry unless I have more than half a page. Plus, it’s sort of different...sort of.) Now, a lot of the time, he’ll be playing vigorously with a squeaky toy, and after a few minutes, we’ll notice he’s panting. Tongue hanging out of his mouth, breathing like there’s no tomorrow, he’ll just LAY there.

“Get some water, Dog!” we shout, and he gives us a look as if to say, Water? Pshh. That’s not going to help my extreme thirst. We bring him some in a paper cup, and he reluctantly laps it up. Afterwards (clearly not panting anymore), he seemingly says, Okay, maybe it did work. Just that one time. You’re still just a bunch of silly humans. Pompous pooch. We love him anyways, though.

Finally, and very unusually, Dog is an optimist. I cannot claim to be in possession of that same characteristic (I jump back and forth between positive and negative attitudes), but Dog is always looking on the bright side. If it’s rainy and Dog gets fewer walks than usual, he thinks, More inside playtime! If he has to get a bath, he shrugs his doggy shoulders and thinks, At least I get treats afterwards! Of course, like most humans, Dog strives to make sure these less-than-preferable things DON’T happen. But if they must, he rides the wave of life and goes along with them.

So concludes my dog blog, the Dog’s features put into an entry on the Internet. Have you ever read the newspaper? Seen the “fillers,” the pieces that the editors put near the bottoms of the paper, just a few lines of nothing to fill up the page when a journalist hasn’t written enough words in an article? This is basically a 700-word filler, intended to provide entertainment and take up space where my mother decided it was my turn to write. I have to admit: it gave me something to do for a little while, and I did have fun being a guest blogger for The Dalai Dog.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get back to my nonexistent life. ;)

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Can't We Just Get Along?!


I have some freelance writing deadlines and Dog has a lot of sleeping to do. (it's raining in Northern California and the drizzle makes us lazy and sleepy.) There are no big primaries in the next few days.

But, stupidly, we turned on the TV for background distraction and we were surprised to see on CNN that John Kerry is endorsing Obama for president. What's up with that? In 2004 Kerry picked Edwards to be his running mate. He must have had faith in him then. What happened in the last four years? Seems like a bit of a slap in the face to Edwards.

(Dog and I are tempted by our dark side to go on and on about ego, jealousy, blame, judgment, but we refuse to go public with such fearful notions.)

Instead, we choose to post some photos of unexpected co-existence, peace and love.










Dog Bless You All!

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

A Miracle in New Hampshire

America, did we just experience a miracle? I don’t know about you, but Dog and I think so.

And it has nothing to do with who won last night.

It’s not about Hillary Clinton or John McCain or any of the other individuals running for president. It’s not about winning or exit polls or ego or how much money you spent or how good you looked or how you crafted a magical message that could both appeal to your base while not alienating anyone else.

The miracle is the message. The miracle is that after this long, exhaustive, surprising, humbling, amazing process that we call democracy, a genuine message is finally starting to emerge from the candidates. And, despite all the posturing and competition that this wonderful, imperfect process engenders, we are beginning to see a Chink in the Armor of The Expected and the Predictable--a tiny crack in which a little light may shine through.

The miracle is about letting go of the illusions that we think we need to win.

The victors in New Hampshire have found their true voices.

It’s no secret that Dog and I have not been too fond of Clinton recently. She seemed too polished, too rehearsed, too calculating. Rather than the strong, brilliant woman that she so obviously is, she seemed to be more about ambition and winning and her own achievement and less so about the greater good for which we imagine Political Service should be all about.

All that changed with one question in New Hampshire. Clinton was down in the polls, projected to lose to Obama by a margin of 10 points or more. It looked like her bright star was fading. She was pronounced a has-been by the media pundits who trounce upon any perceived weakness as an excuse for a news story.

Then Marianne Pernold Young, 64, asked Clinton what she had thought at the time would be a light, personal question…

“How do you do it?” she had asked Mrs. Clinton. “Who does your hair?”

Well, we all know that issue of “hair” can be incite all kinds of emotional trauma, but in this case it incited a little something more unexpected.

For the first time in a long time, or maybe ever, we got to glimpse an image of Hillary Clinton as a real person. And we got a glimmer of understanding of why, after she had already experienced the benefits and the grandeur of the office of president and made millions of dollars in writing and business, why she would persist amid rabid criticism, personal, venomous attacks and physical and emotional exhaustion. In her moment of weakness and vulnerability her ambition was raw—she wanted to make to make the country a better place.

And that moment, that truth gave her the victory in New Hampshire. As she said in her speech last night,

“Over the last week, I listened to you, and in the process I found my own voice.”

The other winner in New Hampshire last night also found his own voice.

In the summer of 2007, it looked like it was all over for McCain. His campaign contributions dwindled and his support among conservatives waned.

In a Feb 2007 Vanity Fair article, Todd S. Purdum sums up McCain’s problems…

“John McCain has spent this whole day, this whole year, these whole last six years, trying to "fix it," trying to square the circle: that is, trying to make the maverick, freethinking impulses that first made him into a political star somehow compatible with the suck-it-up adherence to the orthodoxies required of a Republican presidential front-runner.”

That didn’t work so well. When McCain was down, when there was no money coming in, when he had to fire the advisors and was forced to go it alone, guess what happened? He, too, found his own, genuine voice. And that resonated with America.

Although Dog and I do not in any way endorse Mike Huckabee, we must admit that, when he was trailing far behind in Iowa, he said one very wise thing in the Republican debates may have been what propelled him to the front of the pack in that state…

“I'll be true to my convictions, and I think that's what Americans look for -- not someone they're going to agree with on everything, but somebody who at least has some convictions, sticks with them, can explain them, and can at least have respect for people who have different ones.”

Dog says, “Amen!”

Let’s pray for more truth in the long months to come. Let’s hope for a future less focused on fear and more focused on love—Love of our country, love of all of the people in the country and love for all of the people in the world.

Dog bless you all.

Monday, January 7, 2008

Dog on Politics

After the last couple of days of exhaustive, investigative journalism, Dog was ready to take a good, long nap.

But Dog cannot rest when the future of the free world hangs in the balance!

Unfortunately Dog insisted that we Tivo the Debates in New Hampshire.

Snooze! More of the same old rhetoric! The whole thing makes Dog wonder if anyone has anything new/genuine to say that hasn’t been vetted by the pollsters/campaign spinners.

Dog only wishes that Brad Pitt would have thrown his hat in the ring to make things a little more visually interesting. (OK, Dog insists that this is me talking again. Sorry!) Fortunately for us, the Tivo stopped recording the debates when the new episode of Desperate Housewives came on.

We missed the Republican debate, which we are only very minorly, marginally sad about.

Cut to Live TV…

Oh, Wait! CNN is running a tape of Hillary in which she seems to break down. According to Wolf Blitzer, “Her Eyes Welled Up and Her Voice Broke.”

I have so many opportunities from this country,” she says. “I just don’t want to see us fall backwards. This is very personal for me. It’s not just political. It's not just public. I see what’s happening. We have to reverse it. “ (voice wavering)

And, in a soft voice, “Some people think elections are a game. It’s like who’s up or who’s down. It’s about our country. It’s about our kids’ futures. It’s about all of us together.”

If this is real, Dog has a new opinion of Hillary. Either she has had some really good acting coaching, or Hillary has hit a breaking point in which she realizes what is really important. For the first time, Dog resonates with Hillary's message.

Dog’s dream is that all the candidates who are listening to their spinning consultants and who are attacking each other will decide that their Ego and their own victory is not the most important thing.

Dog asks, What if all the candidates had, as their top concern, the absolute best for our country and the World?

No Ego, No Competition, No Ideas of Winning or Losing. What could be more Un-American?

Or, maybe, what could be more uniquely American?

What if there were a major shift in perception in this election? What if America asked for a miracle?

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Dog Endorses ????? for President! (Part 2)

Thank Dog, our investigation did not uncover any horrifying acts of cruelty or murder against dogs among any of the leading Democratic contenders or their immediate families!

Dennnis Kucinich

In fact, one of the Democrats, Dennis Kucinich just may be the most dog-friendly, pro-animal person to ever run for president:

• He is the only candidate with an official Animal Rights issue statement.
• He has taken a stand against tainted pet food and demanded answers from the FDA.
• He is the only vegan in Congress.

Whoa! Dog is impressed! A life without chicken treats or even cheese—all so that his actions match his beliefs! All that deprivation so that he can live a life free of hypocrisy! If you want change in the way American politics work, Dog can think of no greater role model!

Dog loves what Kucinich says in his Animal Rights platform:

Every one of us knows a story of animal cruelty (editor’s note: especially the Republicans, except for McCain); every one of us knows how in one way or another official policies have sanctioned cruelty to animals. I am working to put compassion into action in our policies with respect to animals in this country and to have America set a higher standard, not only for this country, but for the world; to make sure that all of God's creatures, that all animals are given a chance to have dignity in our society and are given a chance to experience the appreciation they should have as living beings.

Kucinich’s motto is “Strength through Peace.”

Dog says, "Dennis Kucinich, You rock!”

Hillary Clinton

Dog feels bad about it, but he just can’t endorse Clinton. He totally thinks she’s smart and hard-working and all. And Dog would love to see America elect a woman president. And, like many of us, he does miss the Clinton years, and although he wasn’t yet born, he can appreciate the nostalgia of a time of relative peace and stability and economic prosperity.

But Dog has some instinctual resistance to Hillary. Although Dog normally loves women and children, he tends to growl at most men in his fiercest guard dog manner. Dog thinks that if he were to meet Hillary and Bill on a walk, he would greet Bill with a wagging tail… and growl at Hillary. Enough said.

Or maybe not quite enough…

Hillary doesn’t seem to be much of a “dog person,” even though the Clinton’s have a “family dog,” a chocolate lab named Seamus. But Seamus is widely known as “Bill’s dog.”

Hillary strikes Dog as more of a “cat person”—not that there’s anything wrong with that, as Seinfeld would say.

But Dog is worried that Hillary may have been using her White House cat, Socks, as a means of manipulation, of softening her cold public image. Even though she wrote a book featuring Socks and White House dog, Buddy (who was hit by a car after leaving the White House) and wrote that only with the arrival of Socks did the White House become a home, once her time in Washington was done, so was the cat. She abandoned Socks to Bill’s personal secretary, Betty Currie. At least she didn’t hang the cat.

John Edwards

Dog has nothing bad to say about John Edwards. Dog likes the fact that he is a “Son of a Mill Worker” and that he worked hard to make his own way in the world and that any money or material positions he has now, he totally earned on his own. That’s the American Way in action! (Of course, Dog is purebred and sired from a World Champion Havanese, and has ancestrial papers that would stretch out longer than our driveway, but he is not a snob! He has been adopted into a family of Commoners of mixed origins and he is quite content with his simple life among simple people.)

Unlike others, Dog doesn’t have a problem with $400 haircuts. Dog, himself, refuses to go to the regular dog groomers. Instead, I have to cajole him and pet him and hand-feed him chicken treats and trim a little bit here and there over several hours when he needs a cut, prompting my husband to say that Dog has a $400 haircut himself. And, if you can get away with it, why not? is Dog's way of thinking!

Also, Edwards posed on the cover of Men’s Vogue with his pet dog. And he has three dogs, including two new puppies, Rufus and Lilly.

From his Website

Our family includes three dogs – Bella, Rufus and Lilly – because my wife Elizabeth and I believe that taking care of a pet is a great joy that helps teach our children responsibility and compassion for others. Take note, Mike Huckabee!

Also, Edwards is against puppy mills! Again from his Website:

I support legislation to address the chronic animal welfare problems associated with puppy mills. Effective legislation would include better enforcement and higher penalties for violators, with a goal of removing the bad actors while not overly burdening reputable breeders.

Plus, Grandma likes Edwards and Dog likes Grandma.

Barrack Obama

Not much information about Obama regarding dog-friendliness. We know that he doesn’t have a dog now, but that his kids made a deal with him that if he ran for president they would get a dog.

Also, there is a Webiste Puppies4Obama which is pretty darn cute and speaks to his appeal to dog lovers!

Some people have doubts about Obama because of his “lack of experience.” This doesn’t bother Dog. After all, I had a complete lack of experience before Dog came to live with us and it’s worked out pretty Dog-gone well for everyone.

Dog believes that experience is not nearly as important as intelligence and a good heart, and Obama seems to have plenty of both.

Plus, Oprah likes him and Dog idolizes Oprah!

Dog’s Conclusion:

If you must vote Republican, vote McCain.

If you are a dreamer with uncompromising high standards, vote Kucinich.

Otherwise, let’s pray for an Edwards/Obama or Obama/Edwards ticket.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Dog Endorses ????? for President!

The time has come. Iowa has caucused and New Hampshire is debating and the situation is so crazy and undecided that even California (in its Feb 5 primary) may finally have a say in who runs for president in 2008.

The race is as turbulent as Dog’s tummy after too much salami. Onetime frontrunners Guiliani and Clinton don’t look quite so invincible anymore. The special interest groups are circling the wagons around their favorite candidates: The Evangelicals are pushing Huckabee to the front of the pack; Feminists and Liberals and Friends of Bill are barking up Hillary’s tree; Mafiaos, serial adulterers, swarmy big businesses and crooked New York City civil servants have made Guiliani their Alpha Dog.

• (Dog apologizes and wants you to know that that last bit was totally my own. In fact, he absolves all responsibility for what is obviously my interpretation of his positions, and will not be held legally or morally culpable for anything that follows.)

So, where are the Dogs in this process? Since things turned out so spectacularly bad for us in the last two elections using our human brains (or to be more accurate, using the Supreme Court’s brain in 2000 and about 51% of the population’s brain in 2004), isn’t it time we tried something different?

The time has come for Americans to listen to their Dogs! Early primary voters, take your dogs out to the presidential pep rallies! Watch their reactions. Do they growl? Bark? Hump the candidate’s leg? Wag their tail? There is a message there, America! Pay Attention!

Dog thinks we should follow our nose in choosing our next president. Since Dog has not had the opportunity to personally sniff any of the candidates (with the exception of the time aboard the UFO with Kucinich, but Dog is saving that experience for his memoir) he must base his opinions from watching the debates with me (oh, he wanted to switch the channel to Animal Planet, but I insisted that we be informed citizens!) and the investigative info we have dug up, and Oh My! What we have found would curl your tail!

Today, we will address the Republicans. In all fairness, I must admit that Dog normally leans left, but he is willing to have an open mind (and an open mouth if there are treats involved.)

Mike Huckabee

Let’s begin with the newly coronated king of the Republican party—the darling of the right wing—Mike Huckabee. Dog was all ready to give him a tail wag—the homesy charisma (he’s funny!) and, of course, Dog is a big believer in God, although Dog is a little wary about how the Republicans tend to interpret her will. Still, Huckabee seemed like the kind of a guy who would be willing to play slipper tug-of-war in the Oval Office.

You can imagine Dog’s shock and horror when he learned that Huckabee’s son, David, tortured and hung a stray dog at a Boy Scout Camp! He confessed! And was fired from the camp! (for violating the Scout credo to be "kind” which seems to Dog a little more than an understatement.)

And then, Governor Huckabee intervened to prevent the state police from investigating further!

This is wrong, wrong, wrong in so many ways. Dog knows that parents are not to blame for all of their children’s mistakes, but come on—His Son Hung a Stray Dog! This is a way higher on the evil quotient than skipping school or smoking pot, which would probably freak out the Huckabee supporters. Dog asks you, “Can you imagine your child torturing and killing an innocent dog?”

We hope not. And, if you can, we hope that you are investing your time and money in intensive family counseling, not running for president of our great country.

Please do not vote for anyone who would raise a child who would kill an innocent dog.


Rudy Giuliani

As far as Dog is concerned, Rudy Giuliani is about on par with Huckabee, although he didn’t spawn evil, he just married it.

His third wife, Judy, worked for a surgical company that demonstrated their products on live dogs that either died in the demonstration or were killed later. Let’s be clear—this wasn’t research, which would be bad enough. This murdering of innocent dogs was done entirely as a sales pitch! Confetti, fireworks, free drinks, killing dogs! Whatever it takes to close that sale!

Please do not vote for someone who would marry someone who would kill dogs for profit!


Mitt Romney

It’s hard to believe that there could be yet another Republican who would incite Dog’s fury, but, yes, it is true.

Mitt Romney, the movie-star handsome, Mormon, ultra-family-oriented guy first aroused Dog’s suspicion when he began to waffle about really important issues. He heard a rumor that when Romney was running for governor of the liberal, dog-loving state of Massachusetts Romney was all for long walks and chicken treats.

But when Romney had to kowtow to the right wing of the Republican party, he did a 180 on treats and dog walks. Dog doesn’t buy this change of heart. Walks and chicken treats are core values! You don’t change your core values because of poll numbers!

Plus, once, Mitt Romney strapped his family’s Irish Setter into a crate onto the top of their station wagon for a 12-hour driver from Boston to Ontario, Canada.

Please think long and hard before you vote for someone who seems to change his mind about key issues involving ethics, morals and beliefs depending on what he believes people want to hear instead of what he truly believes. Also, someone who would make their family dog travel in a crate ontop of a car for 12 hours!

For all the Republican frontrunners-- Huckabee, Guiliani, Romney, Dog growls!

The only Republican that Dog could possibly endorse is John McCain. Dog doesn’t agree with his stance on the war, but Dog respects his opinion as the only major candidate to have served in a war, and the only candidate at all who could possibly understand “suffering.” Dog respects McCain’s heroism under suffering, even though the concept is completely foreign to Dog, who was freed from his crate at the tender age of 10 weeks when we adopted him. Also, McCain has 27 pets (more or less, counting the 13 fish), including two dogs.

Tomorrow, Dog sniffs the Democrats.